The last couple of days I’ve had a bit of a dip, an occlusion of my normally sunny disposition. Partly due to physical reasons certainly, but also it was one of those periodic instances where the despair at where we are caught up with me. It will all eventually come to an end, and if I were an optimist, which I’m not, I would think that here is a chance to get used to cleaner skies, to swear to do better for the environment and for people. I don’t believe a word of it.
Right now, despite being one of the freest people I know, I’m feeling rather trapped and in the mood to run away. I’ve been on the run for years now, and I fear a stop to perpetual movement is not going to come easy.
I am also very, very worried about Pakistan. I fear that it will have the worst of both worlds: both the economic impacts of the lockdown and the health impacts of a badly implemented one. The mullahs bear a lot of blame for the latter and the country’s government and the people’s khapti nature (trust in God but not in people) even more of it. The case numbers are rising of course, but don’t reflect reality I am sure of it, and yesterday I read a terrifying article suggesting that the number of people brought dead on arrival to hospital, or dying swiftly on arrival, of respiratory illnesses, has skyrocketed. In a country where deaths, leave alone cause of death, is rarely recorded, how many are dying?
Then there is the UK and the rest of the developed world. I feel that there must be a lot of suffering that is invisible and it is bringing to the fore who has a voice that can be heard and who does not. When the middle classes, the people who have voices, are kept inside their homes and covering only themselves, and who can hear the 22 million in the US who have lost their jobs. or the millions in the UK who are trying to apply for universal credit (or the untold numbers who are not applying)? It is a terrible time for all of us, and I see no end to it.